Howdy,
honest questions follow:
Under normal circumstances I don’t speak to anyone in elevators (I don’t even have a private conversation with my friends if there is someone I don’t know riding along with us), but is this really about what he *said* to her? What precisely about this incident is the catalyst for an incorrect act on the guy’s part? Is it simply the implied sexual nature of the request (come back to my room)? Or was it that the guy spoke to her at all? If he merely said, “hey, I really enjoyed your presentation. You made some great points.” would that too have crossed the line?
Or was the actual verbal interaction not the problem at all – was it the fact that he got into the elevator alone with her in the first place? Was it the time of this encounter (4am)? And what times are permissible?
Does it apply to strangers only? What about someone who you’ve seen regularly for years but don’t know well (you live on the same floor in an apartment building, for instance)?
Should this just apply to women? Should a single man abstain from getting onto an elevator with another man (a stranger) at 4am? What about two women?
Is this only about sexual assault? Or is it about violence generally? (Maybe at 4am, the six-foot-four biker dude with the skull tattoos shouldn’t try to get on the same elevator as five-foot-six wimpy pizza delivery guy).
And if we establish this as etiquette, what should our reaction be if someone ignores it? If someone does try to get on that elevator – should the etiquette demand that the elevator passenger attempt to block the way? Should they vacate the elevator? What if they feel uncomfortable taking any of these actions?
I’m genuinely in the dark about what kind of outcome is being sought here. What kind of society am I being asked to help build?
