Ah, gotta love the Census ! The ABC reports that according to 2011 Census data, a grand total of 2,163 Australians still called themselves Scientologists.
It’s probably fair to say that more people use the toilets at Southern Cross train station on any given Monday morning than there are brainwashed Scientology bots left in the country. Good on you, Australians, and good riddance. How about Scientology’s tax status in this country, by the way ? As far as I can see, Scientology over here is still allowed to hide behind the “Advancement of Religion” clause.
I am considering founding my own religion, the “Worshippers of the toilets of Southern Cross”, we will easily have more members than Scientology has in the whole of Australia on one busy bowel-moving Monday morning, and I will be writing to the Australian Tax Office stat, to collect the rich tax benefits for my advancement of religion.
Seriously, ATO, take these not even fringe lunatics off the tax exemption drip already.
I have never seen the Southern Cross toilets, but I will take it on faith that they exist. I will believe Father Martin’s sermons about how they remove the sticking waste from Melbourne commuters. I will spread the word to the unfaithful and convert them. I will build new toilets across the country to the greater glory of the hollowed Southern Cross. But above all, I will accept tax exemptions from the government simply because I believe there is a greater toilet than the one I know. Amen brothers and sisters.
If I may be so bold Father Martin, could I propose the name “Loo’sers” for this glorious new religion?
I saw a thing on telly about a sort of scientology compound in Sydney where naughty scientologists are sent to make amends for their naughtiness by being locked up and fed scraps while slaving away unpaid for the greater glory of L Ron Hubard and that Miscavage bloke. The fact that there’s over 2000 Aussies prepared to sign up for such silliness is a bit of a slap in the face for a rational Australia. The Sydney compound looked like a dump compared to the Disney style churchy things thay’ve got elsewhere. I’d at least want a nice garden and gargoyles.
Sounds ominous.